aliki: (Default)
[personal profile] aliki
Will update with a photodump soon, but things I realized on this trip:

We're obsessed with cleaning ourselves. Most restaurants provide a bowl of cool water with fresh lime to wash your hands before a meal, and then individually-wrapped wet wipes to clean your hands after. Restaurants not only have bathrooms where you can go to do your business, but if you just want to wash your hands, they provide sinks outside the bathrooms (so you dont have to enter the dirty bathroom where people are doing #1 and #2) to wash your hands before and after a meal.

Almost all families (Muslim, Buddhist, and Hindus) remove shoes prior to entering the home. Shoes are considered extremely unclean: we do not bring them in the house, we do not pack them in our luggage with our clothes, we never put our shoes on our bedspreads! Most families practice taking a shower upon returning home as it's considered unclean to spread the "outside dirt" all over the house.

We greet anyone older than you in a room. Which means when you enter a room and you're fairly young, you end up spending 20 minutes saying "Good morning, Aunty Jane! Hello, Uncle Thomas! Hello, Big Sister Susy!" Anyone who is a generation older than you is "uncle" or "aunty". Anyone less than a generation older than you is "big sister" or "big brother". Use discretion with females and always underestimate their age. This is a practice I noticed poignantly this year, as Erika was considered a "rude child"-- she enters a room like an inconspicious wallflower. She hides behind my thighs or sneaks in along the wall to hide in a corner behind furniture, and then tries to quietly observe the scene before integrating herself... but the entire Asian community looks at her and puts the spotlight on her by saying: "HEY YOU DIDN'T SAY HELLO!!" oh lolz.

We eat five or six small meals a day. And each meal seems to take one hour because we sit, and wait for the food to arrive, and eat, and talk, and laugh, and drink our ice drinks, and talk some more... and when we get up to leave, an hour later, someone will say: "So where are we going next for food?" You can also show up at someone's house, say you've already had dinner, and they'll say: "Okay, so just a small bowl of rice?" and put out a heaping pile of rice and ten savory dishes for you to eat.

Date: 2013-09-03 01:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aliki.livejournal.com
Yup! That's exactly what my relatives do! They rush her, or stop their conversation completely, and go "Weh, why you don't say hello!?!? SHY ISSIT??"

I used to be more polite with our first home, and then quietly grumbled when I had to steam clean the carpet. Again.

Now with our second home, I have the shoe rack outside our door, and a sign that says "Abandon all SHOES ye who enter", and I open the door only a shoulder's width and stand in it with a big smile. This stops them from just walking straight in (when they see the host blocking the door) and that normally gives them a second to look to the shoe rack and the sign, and generally they realize they're supposed to take off their shoes before entering.

Of course, now that I have Erika, I just brainwash teach her that we always remove shoes before entering our home, and other should similarly do so. And since Erika is such a stickler for the rules, if I let her near the front door, she'll generally put up her hand (police-style HALT) and say "you forgot to take off your shoes!!" :) Works like a charm! Use Téa!

Date: 2013-09-03 02:06 am (UTC)
smittenbyu: (Sketch)
From: [personal profile] smittenbyu
lol..we had the same thing with D too! And of course they go with, "America you live such solitary lives." D does better with people she is familiar with. And of course, it would be rude of me to point out that for her they are "strangers". But there was always that one uncle or aunt who would come to the rescue. ;)

Somehow with all the mom groups, whether they are Caucasians, or Asians, shoes are taken off. The kid usually takes the lead and adults go with it too! I am too uncomfortable not taking off shoes! :S And D does too now with habit, well, she would love a life without having to wear shoes!

I remember the freak out I had when my roommate (in college) her boyfriend put his shoes on the kitchen counter! lol..they were brand new and never worn but still, OMG no!

ETA: can't wait for photos!!
Edited Date: 2013-09-03 02:07 am (UTC)

Date: 2013-09-03 10:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aliki.livejournal.com
I had a student pack her unbagged worn shoes (with visible dirt on the bottom!) into her carry-on suitcase, which included all her clothes, her makeup bag, and her pillow. Eww. She just threw the shoes right in there with all the other stuff.
(deleted comment)

Date: 2013-09-05 11:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aliki.livejournal.com
Yup! New floors, no messing it up!!

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